Sister Barbara

The middle of August is almost here.  My sister Barbara's birthday is tomorrow. Can't believe she was just 3 years old when i walked down the isle for the first time.  It was 1960.  We both had our whole lives ahead of us.  If we only knew what lie in wait. What did the future hold for the two Darland girls.

Barbara was one of my city guests this summer.  She and i saw the 9/11 Museum and Memorial, we saw Kinky Boots on Broadway  (in fact she saw two musicals), we cooked lunch for some friends, we had lunch on the terrace at Bryant Park, she saw the High-line,  and we laughed and played for the full 10 days.  I hardly cooked a meal.  She took me anyplace i wanted to go for lunch and dinner.  What a treat, as that meant no cooking and no washing dishes. We both are pretty decent at getting a good meal on the table but since i live by myself and am getting older, i don't cook as often as i use too and the dish washing routine is one i am not liking at all anymore.  Barb, however, although recently retired from her teaching position, still cooks an occasion meal for  a husband who not only cooks but does most of the cleaning up,  Now that's a deal if i ever heard one. The summer visit was a blessing for both of us and one not to be forgotten.

My sister and i didn't get to know each other really till after my mother passed away.  The second i found out the news about my mother, i had this yearning for my sister.  This was a new and curious feeling.  We hadn't seen much of each other through the years.  She grew up in a different time.  She was also the 7th child and born just before i was leaving my parents charge.  I married, had my child, and moved out of the valley only to return after she had moved on with her husband and her child.

I did know she could sing and act and that she was much more outgoing then me and seemed more sure of herself.  But i didn't know who she was really.

It wasn't until our mother died that i had a profound yearning to be with my sister. I needed to know her and be with her and hug her and touch her.

I didn't arrive home, in Medford, till the day of the funeral.  My brothers picked me up and it wasn't until then that i saw my sister.  I grabbed hold of her and didn't want to let go. That feeling is still with me to this day.  We skype at least once a week usually more. We text all the time.  We share and cry and talk and complain and laugh and gossip and are always available to each other in any emergency.

My 5 siblings and i are close.  We all get along.  We are  there for each other and love each other. My sister wasn't there to defend me against my 5 brothers, who teased and tormented me ceaselessly growing up, but boy she would defend me now if she needed to.

I don't know what i would do without her.  She's strong and loving and bossy and demanding and sweet and tough and smart and beautiful all in one glorious package.

Barb and her patient husband Kirk host an annual February birthday party at their home on the coast.  Coos Bay, Oregon.  Instead of me joining in on Skype, i will be there in person this winter.  Just my brothers, their wives, Barb, Kirk, and me. Can't wait. My sister will have everything organized and since she and her husband have been doing this for several years, they, and my brothers and sisters in law will know the whole routine.  My sister will fill me in.  She is the boss of the family.

Happy birthday Barbara Cecile.  I am so grateful  you came along when you did. I love you my beautiful girl.